When most people think of love languages they think of acts of service or physical touch. Before this blog I would have said quality time. Giving me undivided attention with conversation and some board games or a movie after cooking dinner together. Although I still want all that, I’ve found a new appreciation for a different love language. Words of affirmation or in my case feedback. I’ve found joy in spending time proofreading and spicy margin comments of feedback about sentence structure or adding a comma.

Feedback is a wonderful mix of praise, pushback, and wait a minute that doesn’t make sense. I’m finding it to be my creative kink. A tough love pep talk that makes not only my writing stronger but also confidence to just create because I know someone is going to stop me from putting garbage out there and making a fool of myself. It has made it easier to just write and create without a second thought and the anxiety of editing everything I try to put out there.

Feedback for me is a mirror with an attitude of sorts. It’s not just “hey you’re doing great” but it’s more of “ok this is good but let’s make it legendary.” It’s like a creative duet or partner and now I’m not doing this all alone. It’s almost like giving me permission to mess up anything I want because I have someone who will reel me in and fix it.

There are some unspoken rules about feedback though. At least for me. Be honest but kind. Don’t tiptoe around what you want to say but deliver it in a way that makes sense for me. Not everyone can do that. Be specific. They can’t just say “oh that’s cool” or “nice blog”. Tell me what’s cool about it. Do you like the color play, the idea behind the piece? What do you like about the blog? Did you learn anything? Is it me? Getting feedback from someone you trust means you’re building something together, not just pointing out all the cracks.

My creative love life, yes I’m romanticizing being creative because why the heck not, needs to be full of feedback. Someone who is going to challenge the plot, the plot twist, and all the other things that go along with what I’m trying to build. I thrive on the back and forth of feedback. I need to bounce ideas off someone who wants to be a part of all the chaos I’m creating. Feedback isn’t just a tool to me, it’s kind of like foreplay for my imagination. So, if someone wants to woo me, skip the flowers, and send that feedback right on over. Ask me questions about what I’m up to today. Push me. Praise me. Rewrite what doesn’t make sense. That’s how I’ll know you care.

XOXO,

Savi Monroe