Starting a new creative project is magical. It gives me a high nothing else can duplicate. Finally, all the ideas I’ve been cooking up can come to fruition. There’s nothing I love more than prepping and getting everything ready and laid out. Whether it’s picking out the fibers, paint colors, making sure everything that needs to be charged is, and I sit down to start is quite possibly better than eating chocolate. The ideas start to sparkle, the visions start to feel cinematic, and those first few weaves or strokes are fueled by pure inspiration.

Then the middle hits. The messy middle in that awkward stage of the glitter fading, visions are blurry, fiber is mixed up and knotted, and suddenly it’s less about inspiration and all becomes nothing but discipline. The second guessing, the “why did I even agree to this”, the “I can’t do this why did I think I could” all start to fill my head and then I go blank. Just blindly staring at the project. No idea where to go from there.

I can’t remember who said it, but someone once said “Beginnings are sexy. Endings are satisfying. The middle? It’s pure chaos.” And nothing has ever felt truer in my life. It applies to so many different situations but for me, this is true about my creative life. Sometimes I feel like it’s just me. I mean, no one talks about it on Instagram or TikTok so I must be all alone right? Lol but it’s just something I’ve come to realize

 The middle is where discipline must babysit inspiration. You know that moment I’m talking about. When the canvas is half painted and you’re not sure if it’s genius or garbage. When the manuscript is 40,000 words in and suddenly you hate everything about it, especially the protagonist. The fiber art project you’ve been working on for a while not just looks like a tangled mess of yarn and you’re questioning all your life choices. The middle is less champagne and more lukewarm coffee.

Now add ADHD into the mix, and oh boy does it turn the messy middle into a full blown sitcom. Add neuro spicy into it and the middle can feel like quicksand. For me, this means I’m constantly tugged between the thrill of starting something new and the discipline required to finish what I started. Here’s the twist though, that nuero spicy also brings creativity, humor, and resilience. The same brain that struggles with discipline is the one that finds playful rituals and habits, quirky hacks, and unexpected bursts of brilliance to push through and finish.

I had to create a few rules to keep me in check. First, I create micro goals. I break everything into bite size wins, so it doesn’t feel so heavy. Instead of finishing the weave, I go with finishing the color you’re working on now. Instead of finishing the book I aim to finish the chapter. Sometimes I create a vibe for myself as well. Light a candle, pour a drink, play a certain playlist, all so it doesn’t feel like a punishment. Most of the time I cope with humor. Laugh at the chaos and treat the middle like my own blooper reel instead of failure. Other tricks I’ve been known to use are things like timers, body doubling, and even bribing myself with snacks. Whatever motivates me to keep going.

The annoying messy middle isn’t glamorous but it sure is where all the magic happens. It’s where those ideas stop being your fantasies and start becoming tangible. It’s where humor, grit, and discipline carry you across the finish line. Maybe just maybe that’s the point. The middle isn’t supposed to be pretty. It’s supposed to be messy, real, and human because when you finally reach the end, you’ll look back and realize the middle part is what has made the story worth telling. So, here’s to the messy middle. The tangled yarn, the half-painted canvas, and the half-written chapter. It isn’t always glamorous, but it is yours. 

XOXO,

Savi Monroe